Same Blog, New Home

For the five of you who read this blog on any recurring basis, I wanted to let you know that I've shifted over to Wordpress. Blogger has some good stuff, but after working in Wordpress for some corporate blogging stuff, I think it offers a little better functionality. And it gives some synergy (even though I totally hate that word) with the url for my freelance writing site. Believe it or not, the "ink for hire" moniker was not available on blogger because some Venice Beach-based tattooing chick already had it registered. Go figure. So I've been doing this one under mattwilsonink on Blogger, which was an early name for my main site, but I scrapped it because I didn't want people to think it was "Matt Wilso Nink".


Anyway... I decided to make the jump, and you can access the new format at http://inkforhire.wordpress.com/. Thanks for reading!

Faith on Film: The Bucket List

Most would probably assume The Bucket List fits in the Faith on Film Festival because it’s got one of those Bible-thumpin’, televangelist-themed confronting your own mortality messages, where you could have the following conversation after watching it with someone you know:

“Jack Nicholson’s looking old.”
“He is old.”
“This wasn’t his best role.”
“Yeah, I liked him better as the Joker.”
“Heath Ledger was a better Joker though.”
“He was. But Jack’s a better actor overall. He was great as that Marvin guy in As Good As It Gets.”
“There were a lot of good people in that movie.”
“Yeah—Helen Hunt, Cuba Gooding Jr., Greg Kinnear. Even Skeet Ulrich.”
“It’s freaky how much he looks like Johnny Depp. Too bad Skeet can’t act as well as him.”
“Yes, it’s a shame. But Johnny Depp can’t act as well as Jack Nicholson either.”
“I don’t know, he’s a really talented actor.”
“Well let’s compare their bodies of work.”
“As long as we’re not comparing bodies—that would give me the willies. Let’s have at it.”
“Should we start with Depp’s role in 21 Jump Street or Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare.”
“OK, you win.”
“Speaking of Freddy’s dead, and given that we just saw a movie on making a list of stuff to do before you kick the bucket, and you mentioned Heath Ledger who left this earth way too soon, have you considered what might happen to you after you die?”
“I’ll be gone for good? Like Cuba Gooding Jr.’s career?
“Um, right… but where will you go?”
“Hopefully not to a place where I’ll be forced to watch Daddy Day Care or The Land Before Time XIII again and again for eternity. Because that would be hell.”

But I’m not going down that road here. Instead I’m focusing on what Morgan Freeman says: “Either get busy living or get busy dying.” Oh wait, wrong movie—that one involved digging tunnels and a self-righteous prison warden, though it certainly had its major share of faith-based elements too (maybe we’ll tackle that one eventually).

For those who haven’t seen The Bucket List, Jack and Morgan are two cancer-ward roommates who make a list of things to do before kicking the bucket. They were things like go sky-diving, travel the world, and for some strange reason, drive some old hot rods really fast on a race track, and then crash them (I’m thinking that would dislodge a catheter, but that part of the plot remained unexplored). What was so relevant here was that doing everything on their list wasn’t what brought them the fulfillment and closure they were seeking in life. It was the relationship stuff. For Morgan, it was re-building his marriage. For Jack, it was re-connecting with his long-estranged daughter.

With faith, like in real-life, it’s not a matter of “do.” It’s a matter of “is.” “To-be’s” are much more important than “to-do’s.” I’m a firm believer in the concept that to be connected with God, one must experience Him relationally. Checking things off a list to draw closer to Him just doesn’t do it. It’s rote. Sure, you can do things God-related that can reflect or express a relationship with Him: Jesus healed the sick, people give money, guys walk old ladies across the street, and missionaries travel overseas. But experiencing an act is very different from experiencing the “person” of God. You can do an act of service, read the bible, or say a prayer, but all of that has to be about Him rather than you, the action, or what you get out of it. It’s all about the source of your focus.

There’s a poignant scene where Morgan Freeman is in Hong Kong, and Jack sets up the opportunity for him to spend a night with the woman of Freeman’s dreams—one who is beautiful, intelligent and full of adventurous experiences, such as scaling Everest, the pinnacle feat of his Bucket List. It’s at that very moment that he realizes being with his wife is what brings him the most contentment. He abruptly stops his preoccupation with his list, the “to-do’s” that had wedged him even further away from her than he already had been, and he runs right back into her loving arms—the very place that provided exactly what he was seeking: peace and contentment. He stops “doing.” He “is” with her. He is hers.

It’s a tear-jerker (though I didn’t shed any—no really, I’m serious), but it also has its funny moments too, particularly when Sean Hayes is in a scene. Overall, though, it’s a great representation of faith on film. And it has a great theme song.

Worth Witnessing: A Turkey's Plea

Shameless plug time… here’s the latest RevolutionEyes offering. We spent a couple of hours on the farm of David Louden in Dawsonville making this Thanksgiving video, which BTW, is available to the consuming public at Sermon Spice.

We had a great time shooting the turkey (with a video camera, obviously, no weapons were involved) named Sandwich, and meeting the other animals on his farm—my two boys accompanied us and had a blast. David’s family was very accommodating (if you’re ever in the market for custom furniture, check him out), and we actually learned some turkey facts: their heads are like mood rings. If they’re content, it turns a bluish color. If they’re upset, it turns red. Yes, Sandwich’s head is read in all of the video—I don’t think he appreciated me trying to round him into the camera’s view multiple times that afternoon.

Anyway, do his kind a favor and go easy on the turkey for your November feast.

Making a Mid-Season Splash

Another ugly win, but a win none-the-less. Run Ricky Run was back with a 100-yard game, Ted Ginn had an incredible TD catch and 100-yard kick off return (though it was negated for a holding call), and Sparano's coaching skills continue to shine like a seasoned vet.

Being a Dolfan, it's always been tough. With the exception of the past four years, the Dolphins have won fewer than eight games only three times since I've been alive (one of those years was the strike-shortened season where they went 7-2). That means they've always been in contention. The only downside to that is that it means you never get a high draft pick--but that never mattered. At least not until Dave Wanstache starting picking people, which is where the four years of frustration first took root and left us in misery last year. Given that, with a new GM, coach, QB and a ton of other question marks, at the half-way point of this season, I never expected:

1) To have this many Dolphin-related posts. Five wins, one game above .500. Who would've thunk? Not this Dolfan, I can tell you that much.

2) Chad Pennington would be an MVP candidate. He's not putting up spectacular stats, but he's consistently putting up good numbers and manages the game like a coach on the field. He's got to be the best off-season signing in the league.

3) To hear serious playoff talk. They've got a pretty soft schedule remaining. It's possible they could win 10 games. No, really. I'm serious.

4) To see a college formation succeed so well in the pros--with the Dolphins working it to perfection thanks to one new wrinkle after another. Cam Cam was supposed to be an offensive creative genius. Sparano's contribution have made Cam Cam just look plain offensive.

5) Nearly everything would go right this year. Last year, the 'Phins lost six games by three points or less--because of poor coaching and so many intangibles. This year, it's been the other way around. In fact, they could easily be 7-3 had it not been for last season-like flukes not going their way against the Nasty Jets and the Texans.

Half-way there to redemption. We'll see if Parcells & Co. can avoid the annual December swoon and finish it out in style.

O My

The Maverick went down without much of a fight. History has been made. It really is quite an accomplishment, given our nation’s past. Many have predicted Obama's policy-making will turn our country in a Socialist nation. Let's just hope we don't go so far as to become the U.S.S.A.

Yeah... But...

In any season where you weren't following a 1-15 disaster, you'd probably look at a win like this and say, "Eh... it wasn't pretty, but at least we got the win. I hope we play better next time." But this is the Dolphins we're talking about, so we should be ecstatic, right? Well... with a fan base and a media market where high expectations border on ludicrousness (heck, after the Dolphins had won two games there was a plethora of buzz about making the playoffs), it's still one of those "yeah... but" scenarios, because yeah, this was supposed to be a rebuilding year... but they are starting to look like a legitimate contender.

So, the general tone here will be one of optimism with a good dose over-zealous criticism, because the thinking here with these five thoughts is screw what happened last season... we should win the Super Bowl this year:

1) Yeah, the Dolphin D amazingly held the Broncos to team-record 14 yards rushing... but, gave up more than 300 yards in the air.

2) Yeah, they gave up more than 300 yards in the air... but, the 'Phin D picked off three Jay Cutler passes and ran one back for TD.

3) Yeah, Ronnie and Ricky had another sub-par day... but Ronnie had one long run of 30+ yards and scored a TD on the ground.

4) Yeah, Chad Pennington had a lower completion percentage, an interception and no TD passes... but he threw for 280 yards and controlled the clock with more than a 13-minute advantage over the Bronco offense.

5) Yeah, Ted Ginn went back to looking like a 4th round draft pick... but he did have a 41-yard kick return and the undrafted Greg Camarillo continues playing like an All-Pro receiver.

Yeah, I had doubts about this game, and this season... but I've been pleasantly surprised.

Worth Witnessing

I’m not sure what it is about this video, but it just cracks me up every time I watch it. The Maverick might not win this upcoming election, but he sure can bang on the drums.


via videosift.com

The Cam Cameron Redemption Tour Continues…

After handing it to his old team (our team) last week, the dearly thankfully departed Cam Cameron continues to influence the play of the Dolphins this season in his absence ... though finally, in a good way. His big signing last off-season, Joey Porter, who was a no-show through his first 15 games, continued to be a beast on the playing field this year, and Ted Ginn actually had a game where he looked like a first round draft pick—his biggest game by far. Just look at what happens when you play to the strengths of your players! Why couldn't you ever figure that out Cam????

But enough about Cam—nice guy, good offensive coordinator, horrible head coach. We’re so much better off without him. While the Dolphins were in so many games late last year, they couldn’t pull out a win. Or beat any of the three arch rivals. This year’s been a different story. Especially today, with a come-from-behind win against Buffalo. In fact, two of our three wins have come against the Nasty Pats and those Sorry Bills, and had Brett Favre not sprinkled his fairy dust on the football, we would’ve beaten the New York JV team as well.

This was just a sweet win against a team that has caused so much frustration over the years (I still have nightmares of screen passes to Thurman Thomas going for forty-yard gains)--and no one expected it. I’d like to see the R&R express get back on track with the running game, but Ginn’s big day makes up for it, and Ricky had good stats catching the ball.

With Ronnie’s production slacking a bit these last couple of games, it’s a toss up between who the team MVP has been so far—Chad Pennington, who’s been more accurate than Tina Fey’s impersonation of Sarah Palin, or Joey Porter, who’s treated every quarterback he’s faced like they’re Levi Jones at the Texas Hold ‘Em table. Both guys, and Ginn, had huge days. Kudos also to rookie Dan Carpenter, who had another solid day and is making no one miss last year’s team MVP, the kicker.

I'm telling you, we've come a long way: tripling our win total from last year, MVPs who do more than kick the ball and a coach whose name avoids redundancy.

Boys in the Hood (my Fatherhood, that is)

SUPER SWIRL

As I was brushing teeth and hair after the boys’ evening tub, my five-year-old requested the hair-stylings of one of his favorite super-powered heroes. “Can I have a Superman swirl?”

“Sure,” I said, trying to fashion his bangs into the familiar “S” that hangs in the middle of the Man of Steel’s forehead. Of course, younger brother needed to have one too now.

But then, big brother asked me a very poignant question: “Daddy, how come Superman’s swirl never gets messed up?”

I’d never really considered it before. But it’s a really good question, because no matter if he’s battling bad guys, showcasing more power than a locomotive or leaping tall buildings in a single bound, the coif never gets messed up. I honestly didn’t have an answer. So I just suggested the obvious. “He probably uses a lot of hair gel.”

“What’s hair gel?”

“You put it in your hair and it makes it stay in place.” He has no idea since Dad’s never had a reason to use it before (at least not in this past decade).

“Even when you fly really, really super fast?”

Apparently so. Flying faster than a speeding bullet has no effect on it.

I'm guessing only kryptonite could straighten that thing out.

Way Back When: Tom & Jerry

We recently bought the boys a “Tom & Jerry” DVD—something we found at Target for $5. I guess as a concerned parent, you could argue it promotes violence, not playing together well or not being kind to your neighbor. And from the more prevalent smacking of things against other people's heads by B2 here lately, some of the arguments may have a very valid point. But it is funny. And slapstick. Plus you can always justify certain episodes as lessons in loving your enemies—especially the ones where Tom and Jerry team up, working together to overcome a shared nemesis, like Spike the bulldog…

OK, maybe not.

But anyway, I loved these cartoons growing up, watching them over and over each weekday after school. And much to my delight, the boys loved them too. The DVD had 15 episodes on it, and with each one, they cracked up—huge belly laughs. Sure, aside from the animated bedlam, they also have their share of other things that aren’t entirely appropriate for little ones (especially those occasional racial caricatures, and to a lesser degree all those loaded guns in the house—did they live in a militia’s compound, or what?), but overall I think it’s pretty harmless. And much better than the crazy crap you see on Cartoon Network.

I actually found myself still enjoying them too, as brought back a lot of memories, and any time a part of your past generation reconnects with a new one, it’s a very cool thing. Unless it’s my parachute pants. Or mullets. Or one of these (though I never had one. No really, I’m serious).

Worth Witnessing

English lessons that are 2 Legit 2 Quit…

The Japanese may have a leg up on us when it comes to automobiles, game shows, animation, and public education, but finally… we’ve got something on them: methodology for teaching a second language.

I can only imagine what the parents who probably paid a fat stack of yen for these English lessons might have been thinking. Of course, if I were the teacher, I can’t say I wouldn’t have used some Hammer Time, or even Vanilla Ice and Flava Flav myself to bridge the two languages… “Children, repeat after me: Rolling, in my five-point-oh…”

While their English skills are developing nicely, and it’s obvious they're having a lot of fun, unfortunately, they were not blessed with a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet like Hammer.

I Could Really Get Used to This...

Really, I could. When looking at the schedule at the beginning of the season, this upcoming week against Houston was where I really thought the 'Phins would have their best first shot to get win number one. And here we are sitting at 2-2. It's week five, and we've already got double the amount of wins as last year (OK, that's both pathetic and encouraging). But enough of last year--it's a whole new era. Proof:

1) The Dolphins actually found some toughness, and played some serious D. They kept the all-around offensive juggernaut LT to 35 yards, and the entire Chargers team to 200 total offense. AND a game-saving fourth-and-goal stuff (of LT no less)! Is this defense for real?

2) They only made one mistake. Granted it was a fumble on a kick-off and nearly cost them the game, but unlike last year, they didn't let that happen this time.

3) They've beaten the two teams (soundly against those Nasty Pats!) who were in the AFC Championship game last year. You could say one was a fluke, but two? Belief is sinking in.

4) We've had a couple of draft picks from years' past sightings again... Ted Ginn continues to have a handfull of catches per game, and Matt Roth is playing like... well, he's playing! And even had a sack and a few tackles for losses. And Vernon Carey's finally anchoring like the lineman he was in college.

5) The emergence of consistsency: Greg Camarillo (the hero of last year's only win) keeps reminding me of the dearly departed Chris Chambers (who had his own good game for San Diego), the balancing acts of Chad's arm and Ronnie's legs, and Joey Porter's play at linebacker--he's finally backing up his talk with his play and earning his big pay... it's actually bringing back mostly good memories of Bryan Cox with the loud mouth and sacks (minus the "salutes" of the Buffalo faithful).

So there you go... five 'Phin facts to say they're maybe not quite ready to sing this song, but hey, they're competing. And actually living up to this season's marketing slogan: A New Beginning.

Observations/Rants/Ramblings

We Don’t Need Another Hero—We Need to Act Like One


Atlanta never seems to be short on shortages. First there was the water crisis, where we basically had 60 days of drinking water left in the lake thanks to the Corps of Engineers draining Lanier’s levels well below normal so that some “endangered” mussels in Florida that weren’t even native to that area could live. We’ve got school-system budget crunches. Clear air quality's in short supply. Nobody could find a Wi last Christmas for their kids. And now, we don’t have any fuel at our gas stations. This is what you see everywhere:



It’s getting bad. They say relief is on the way as the Hurricane Ike-ravaged part of the Gulf is starting to return to normal levels of oil production, but for now, if we were all wearing leather, and everybody drove like me, I’d swear we were living in Mad Max’s world. Because people are acting like Road Warriors while waiting in the Jimmy Carterish-length lines of your local Shell station.

Case in point: My wife recently sat in line of a pre-pay only station where the max they’d let you put in was $30. After waiting forty-five minutes, she finally was next in line for the pump, when some Lexus-driving “lady” tried to cut right in front of her and the other patient people lined up behind her. My wife inched as close as she could to the car filling up and walked into the cashier to pre-pay, where the “lady” tried to cut in front of her in that line too. The “lady” abruptly said she was next, and my wife corrected her, saying she’d been waiting for some time. The “lady” said she had to hurry and get to the airport, to which my wife explained she needed to hurry and get home so I could leave for a meeting downtown.

The “lady” then proceeded to call my wife a “funny bunny.” Only, it wasn’t “funny bunny.” But the first two letters of the first word she used were the same as in funny, and the second word started with a “b” and had the same number of letters as bunny. The clerk at the store summed it up best: “That was not very lady-like.”

Fortunately, it did not come to blows (I’d have bet the farm on my wife, BTW). But that hasn’t been the case at many other gas stations. People are punching each other out over gas. Why is there such a panic and so much turmoil? For one, people are addicted to their cars. Second, it’s hard to get around anywhere in Atlanta with less than a half-tank of gas. But third, and overall, we don’t know how to deal with crises any more. And by “we” I mean the consumer(ing) generations of America.

My grandfather’s generation dealt with two World Wars and the Great Depression. They were tough. But since then? We’re all soft. Baby boomers had Vietnam and Korea, which had horrible repercussions on many soldiers and their families, but collectively as a nation, it didn’t impact us greatly. The black community boomers fought bravely through civil rights, but again, as an entire nation, we didn’t suffer through that all together—there were too many white bystanders. The worst we Gen X and Yers have had to deal with was the Spice Girls. The problem is, it didn’t build much character in us to face the tougher challenges awaiting us down the road. If anything, it just acclimated us to bad music so the Pussycat Dolls could rise to fame.

You could argue 9/11. But it was an isolated event. It crushed the spirit of NYC, and halted everyone across the U.S. for several days, but overall, only NYC continued to feel the deep repercussions over time. And it seems that now, just seven brief years later, we’ve forgotten the lessons learned. So while it was a brief national crisis, it was more geographically isolated in nature. The same could be said for Hurricane Katrina. Or wildfires in California. The two Iraq Wars and Afghanistan, like ‘Nam and Korea, have affected us politically, economically, at the pump, and at the individual family or hometown levels, but hasn’t brought us to our knees from a full-fledged iron-booted kick to the collective groin of our nation (in terms of geography, where would that be… Oklahoma?) just like any other of this stuff.

Overall, we’ve had to endure nothing long-term (fortunately for us, the third album was a flop and we could move ahead unhindered). What will happen when something serious drops on us? Will this economic crisis make an Armageddon out of life as we know it right now? Maybe we’ll end up living in a place like Beyond Thunderdome. Or worse yet, the post-Apocalyptic world of Cormac McCarthy’s The Road.

I sure hope not. But I can’t dwell on it long. I’m on “E” (which here lately means less than half-a-tank) and need to go find some gas. I’ll be like Max and bring a sawed-off shotgun and dog along with me though, just to be safe. Or my wife.

What the heck ever happened to... Bird Flu?

There aren’t many things of which I’m afraid—I mean really afraid, aside from spiders, Pet Cemetery, Linda Blair as a child (or any ghoulish-looking little girl for that matter), that freaky one-eyed witch from the Kevin Costner Robin Hood flick, Kimbo Slice, and waking up in the middle of the night to see someone standing over me next to my bed, regardless of whether it’s my wife, kids, a ghost girl, Kimbo Slice, Kevin Costner or anybody else. But one thing that really freaks me out are those crazy, deadly viruses, such as Avian Influenza, also known as Bird Flu.

Because of this, living in a potential Bird Flu hotspot—thanks to all the chicken-producing farms that dot our area’s landscape—has never sat well with me. Especially when all you heard on the news every single day was that the next big plague was on its way. Sure, it’s all well beyond my control, and I wouldn’t say I had poultry pandemic panic or anything, and it's not what'll happen to me after I die, because I know that's all good and taken care of. But the thought of bleeding profusely from my eyes, ears and nose while convulsing with a 107-degree fever just isn’t my preferred way of leaving this world for the next one.

Anyway, remember about a year-and-a-half ago when it happened first in some Far Eastern country (not far from the SARS breakout), killing several people who had fowl as part of their families, then spread to some Indian town, found its way to Albania, crept into Western Europe, flew into Africa, and then next thing you know, took wings to the U.K? At this point all you heard was one media outlet after another proclaiming like some “The End is Near” sandwich-sign wearing naysayer, “It’s coming, it’s coming, it’s coming!!! And we’re ALL GONNA DIE!!!” Books were written on how to survive it, bad TV movies were made, Vitamin C and Purel flew off the shelves, pigeons suffered hate crimes.

And then…

Nothing happened. You never heard a word about it. After all the panic, just like that, the mass hysteria was gone. Was it a global conspiracy involving governments and drug companies? Was it ever a truly legit threat?

I don’t know… that’s why I’m asking. Not that I miss it, but I’m just wondering what the heck ever happened to bird flu???

Until I get answers, I’m not about to give up Chick-Fil-A anytime soon, but you won’t see us adopting any birds for pets—the only way fowl enters our home is by way of the grill. And then cooked very well done, just to be safe.

It Came in Week 3, Not Week 15 This Time!!!

For the first time this season, I can finally say, “It’s a beautiful day!”

Not just because the Dolphins had their first win of the season, but because they did so in incredible fashion against one of the teams I’ve despised for their un-sportsmen like conduct dating back to 1982. Ironically, the massive beatdown of these Nasty Patriots also included breaking their regular-season win streak previously held by the Dolphins (though only the Dolphins went undefeated AND won the Super Bowl).

Prior to Tom Brady’s season-ending knee injury, the chances of the Dolphins winning this game were about as good as, I don’t know, me ever willingly accompanying my wife to see this movie (she saw it with her girlfriends). But honestly, even with Brady on the sidelines, my hopes weren’t real high—especially after the heart-breaking Jets loss and the Pats two first wins. I’ll start believing now. (Side note: Regarding Brady, I don’t believe in karma, and while it’s tempting to entertain thoughts of AFC East rivals’ star players going on the disable list every time they play the ‘Phins I certainly don’t wish a career-threatening injury on anyone, but you just knew all that cheating on New England’s part was come going to come back to haunt them in a devastating fashion at some point.)

But back to Ronnie Brown… Mr. Ronnie-War-Eagle-Who-Was-About-To-Live-Up-To-That-Top 3-Draft-Pick-Status-Until-Those-Nasty-Dirty-Playing-Patriots-Destroyed-His-Knee-For-The-Season-In-Last-Year’s-Game-Brown had the game of his life: 100+ yards with four touchdown runs (pretty much all on the same play each time) and a nice rollout pass to Anthony Fasano for another score. It was so nice to see the Run-Ronnie-Run-Ricky-Run show finally take off, with Ricky having a worthy game of his own after all we’ve experienced with him the last four years. But it was Ronnie who put on the finest performance any Dolphin back has had in recent memory. It brought back shades of Ricky’s back-to-back 200+ games in 2002, Lamar Smith’s 220 yards against the Colts in the 2000 playoffs (has it really been that long since they’ve been there?), and the nice productive showings from Bobby Humphrey, Mark Higgs, Cecil Collins, Troy Stradford, Sammie Smith, Bernie Parmalee, Irving Spikes, Terry Kirby, Karim Abdul Jabar, Lawrence Philips, John Avery, J.J. Johnson… Nope, that’s about it.

And to think that the secondary and offensive line showed up as well. Heck, even Tedd Ginn Jr. (I think I’ll stop referring to him with the junior because there’s little doubt it’s his dad out there playing) had a little flair with 50 yards worth of catches. Who would’ve imagined?

Like I said, it was a beautiful day. Questions as the bye week approaches:

1) Are there any more questions about whether there are enough snaps for Ronnie and Ricky to share?
2) Are Phillip Merling and Kendall Langford going to make us soon forget the pain of Jason Taylor leaving with their outstanding play these first three games?
3) Will Chad Pennington continue his consistent play? (It sure is nice to have that at QB—haven’t seen it with the past 10 play-callers, not since Jay Fiedler succeeded Dan Marino... yeah, a very long time… sad…)
4) Why didn’t we see Chad Henne get any action? (Not that I’m complaining about keeping the other Chad in to run up the score on Belichick).
5) What’s the most awkward pairing of Dolphin legends on recent TV commercials? Danny-Boy’s “I lost 22 pounds” Nutrisystem spot with Larry the Cable Guy? Or Don Shula’s bizarre, futuristic virtual football challenge with Jay-Z in a Budweiser ad? (Honestly, is there any plausibility to Shu losing to the man with the hard-knock life in that one? I mean, come on—if Beyonce’s beau cashed in all his bling to buy all the football strategy know-how he possibly could, Shula’s protruding chin alone could out-coach him… Though Jay-Z might not have drafted Eric Kumerow in the first round…

Let’s hope this is the beginning of the redemption tour of the only undefeated and almost-completely-defeated team in NFL history. It’s nice to feel good as a ‘Phin-philiac again.

Worth Witnessing

Maybe you've been rick-rolled. Now, consider yourself barack-rolled. I wonder if O approved this message...

The Next Great Combo

The other morning at breakfast, I asked Boy1 what he wanted with his cereal. “Peanut butter,” he answered.

“You can’t put peanut butter on your cereal,” I replied.

“OK—watermelon.”

“Sure, watermelon,” I responded, starting to cut it up.

“With peanut butter on it,” he added.

“What?!”

“I want peanut butter on my watermelon,” he said, matter-of-factly.

“You can’t put peanut butter on watermelon,” I told him.

“Why not?” he asked.

Good question… why not? (He settled for an English muffin to go along with the watermelon, btw). What makes peanut butter not go with watermelon? The taste? Have you ever tried it? Me neither. So how could we judge beforehand? That got me thinking…

Remember those Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups commercials from the 80’s? Where someone would be eating peanut butter straight out of a jar in some public place (because, you know, people really do that), and someone else would be eating a chocolate bar, and some “random” accident occurred where the two would collide? Then the public peanut butter jar eater would say, “hey, you got chocolate on my peanut butter,” and the chocoholic would say, “hey, you got peanut butter on my chocolate!” Then at the same time, they would both taste the results and say, “YUUUUMMMMM! What a combo!”



OK, long explanation when I could have just said my conversation with B1 convinced me to look for the next great combo for taste bud euphoria, along the likes of well-known achievers eggs and bacon, peanut butter (a very team-oriented flavor) and jelly, milk and Oreos, etc. As Remy the Rat in Ratatouille says, “Each flavor is totally unique, but combine one flavor with another, and something new was created… there are possibilities unexplored!” It’ll be a work in progress with endless possibilities but I believe the next great combo will be found.

But first up? The obvious… Peanut butter and watermelon.

Sweet and creamy individually… even somewhat of a healthy combo together… (btw, my wife thinks I should be devoting my time to more productive things…).


Alrighty then, here we go.

Hmmm… you know, it’s actually not too bad. The sweet taste and wet crunch of the melon hit before the peanut butter did, which then took over as the stronger of the two. The aftertaste seemed a little fishy though—not fishy like suspect, but fishy as in coming from the sea. Weird, I know.

Though tolerable, it definitely wasn't the perfect combo. Peanut butter may be fruit-friendly (such as with apples or the fried PB and banana sandwich Elvis made famous), but I wouldn’t highly recommend this pairing. Just as a side note, if you ever want to try this yourself, steer clear of the crunchy peanut butter. Peanut pieces are fine to eat. Watermelon seeds… well that’s a different story. It'd be hard to tell the two apart.

Until next time…

FAITH ON FILM: Children of Men

Kicking off the so-called Faith on Film Festival is one of my favorites: the film adaptation of P.D. James’ Children of Men.

As a warning, though, this is not a movie for the easily offended. Still, Children of Men is quite a feat. You can go on and on about its cinematography, the action sequences, the seven-minute cut-free take of a frantic run through an urban battle zone, the recurrent symbolism of background minutia, and of course, the fine acting performances by Clive Owen, Michael Cain and Julianne Moore. But it's the message of sacrifice and the sanctity of life that's so incredibly illustrated. The dark, futuristic setting where no human has been born in twenty years for reasons undiscovered has the U.K. government initiating a holocaust of sorts with non-British segments of the population, elitists valuing preservation of the arts more than human lives, and no one caring a thing for their neighbor. Underground revolutions brew violently in guerilla-styled attacks against the imperialists while the rest of the fragile society clings to little more than apathy and whatever intoxication methods available, seemingly intent to fade away into mankind's extinction.

Yet in the end (spoiler alert), each segment—oppressed victim, soldier, rebel, bystander—is completely awestruck at the sound of a newborn's cry, the first in nearly two decades. Humbly, the warring crowds part sides as the mother carries the little miracle between them. Then, in the blink of an eye, anarchy ensues once again.

I also love Clive Owen's every-man who's lost his faith and reason for living, stuck in the doldrums of a meaningless, hopeless existence, until he discovers the one who can literally save humanity. Instantly, he finds his purpose, letting nothing stand in his way to shepherd them to safety. It consumes him, and a handfull of others, regardless of never even really knowing the mother--but that matters little with what is at stake. In the end, blood is shed to the ultimate degree, a sacrifice made on behalf of another so that new life is made possible.

Too bad not many saw this film—if you didn't, go rent it. Just be cautioned it’s not for everyone (my wife did not like it) because of the excessive violence, f-bombs and a grueling childbirth scene. But it’s amazing, not just as a piece of artwork, but also because of the messages of hope, life and sacrifice it contains. Definitely not a positive, happily-ever-after story—in fact, to say it was bleak would be a gross understatement. But so is saying it's a good flick. Based on its overall theme and message, Children of Men is, without a doubt, a glaring representation of faith on film, and gives a heavy dose of discussion fodder.

Way Back When: RAD

My life in 8th grade pretty much consisted of the following: playing as much baseball as possible, collecting baseball cards, beating Bowser and his minions in Super Mario Bros., trying to figure out how to get Tracey Tingy to like me, memorizing the lines of Bon Jovi and Beastie Boy songs, and watching The Lost Boys, Aliens and the following flick at least 100 times (yep, that sadly sums it up).

Riding my BMX to the local video store to re-check Rad out once again became a weekly ritual that year. My other bike-riding buddies in the neighborhood and I actually built our own version of the movie’s nefarious Helltrack that “star” Cru Jones had to conquer, though ours was more like Hecktrack… It was pretty lame and no one ever dared to try the back flip stunt in the movie’s climax…

Anyway, Rad actually came up in conversation three separate times recently, each with different people—no, really, I’m totally being serious here—and it resurrected thoughts of that fine film. Certainly in the history (and future for that matter) of cinema has a school dance never before been portrayed with such glorious choreography. Being scored to “Send Me an Angel” (a different one from the Scorpions’ cheesy love ballad) makes it even totally Radder of an experience.

If you’re new to Rad, yes, that is Uncle Jesse’s (Full House, not Dukes of Hazard) girlfriend, and yes, that is former gold-medal gymnast Bart Connor (the Italian Stallion’s Adrian—Talia Shire—has a role in the movie too). Oh, if only it would come out on DVD… This will have to do for now… Enjoy…

Miami Dolphins

Turning the Page (Hopefully)

Parcells makes his mark. I wanted the franchise QB, and maybe Beck or the newly-drafted Henne will finally end the search for the messiah quarterback after the greatest passer in NFL history’s ascent to Canton, but I don’t know that Matt Ryan was that guy. What I do know is that Chris Long was a safe pick. Not a lot of splash, and absolutely no drama since he was signed days before Saturday’s draft began, but this definitely set the tone for a new era that will hopefully make us forget all about the Wannstache, Nick Satan and 1-15 regimes.


Howie Long’s kid probably would’ve been a good pick too, but I think Parcells & Co. adequately addressed the defensive end positions as Jason Taylor sadly dances his way from South Florida to a new Hollywood career (hopefully better than ex-NFLers Jim Brown’s and O.J.’s). Let’s just hope Chris can protect whoever’s taking snaps and open big holes for Ronnie Brown and Ricky Williams.

Overall, I thought it was a pretty good draft and I didn’t scream in agony over passing on a Brady Quinn, so that’s an improvement over last year’s right there ("Ted Ginn Jr.?? WHO??? [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE]!!!" OK, it wasn't quite that bad...). They addressed a lot of their needs, which, being the Dolphins is pretty much everything… save for Jay Feely. Yep, the one solid area for Miami is their kicking game. Oh, and their mascot. T.D.'s a great mascot (isn't that sad?).

Boys in the Hood (my Fatherhood, that is)

A VEGGIE NUGGET TALE

Do you know what this is?

Yes, it's a video tape (yes, we still have a VCR too). But that's not what I want you see. Look closer...

Do you see it? Zoom in and focus on the spool of the videotape. It’s supposed to be round.

Figure it out yet?

It took me a while at first too. The other day I was trying to put in a video for boy 2—"Veggie Tales: Madame Blueberry,” to be specific. It’s a good story about contentment and Mr. Lunt’s “Cheeseburger” song is priceless—a favorite in these here parts, but I digress… Anyway, I started to shove the tape into our VCR (yes, we still watch things on it) when something caught my eye. The video’s spool was more of an oblong shape rather than its typical roundness. Closer examination revealed what appeared to be a bite of a chicken nugget somehow wedged between the reel and tape.

Think about it—just how in the world could a former member of Chick-fil-A four-piece kid’s meal wind up in this position? There’s no point of entry. Even if there was, how could the video tape get perfectly wrapped around the nugget and the spool? It defies all logic and laws of physics. I couldn’t even come close to getting it out. How long it’s been in there is a mystery solved only by… I have no idea... carbon dating?

Instead of trying to figure it out, I just took in the moment, thinking this was actually some kind of unique acheivement for whoever did it. Honestly, I didn't know whether to be proud of the fact that history will probably never witness something else like this again or if I should be a little afraid of what else I might discover in the future as these boys grow older and get into more things.

Moral of the story: By all means, eat more chicken. Just keep an eye on your kids while they’re doing it.

BTW—We didn’t bother seeing if the tape still played, fearing that somehow the nugget would be forced out and into the bowels of the VCR, which has had (and probably still does) its share of Hot Wheels and Legos inside (but it still works). This is yet another reason why we only buy DVDs now.

FAITH ON FILM FESTIVAL

Much of the Religious Right claims that Hollywood has this thing against Christians. I’m sure there are some legitimate merits (such as The Golden Compass), but for the most part, I really disagree. If there’s a bias against believers in Showbiz, I think a lot of it is self-induced, and also has more to do with the world in which we live rather than Tinseltown specifically. So instead of calling for more faith-based flicks to be released in theaters each week, such as Facing the Giants (which I liked but was pretty hokey), or railing against the system for reasons that are often more political than genuine, what everyone really needs to do is just open their eyes: faith is on film everywhere.

I certainly agree there is a huge void of family fare, but the last thing we need is an onslaught of movies stamped with a fish sign that are full of diluted quality for the sake of presenting a message. Also, as believers, if we really want the world to listen, we don’t need any more movie efforts seeking to draw the line even deeper in the sand with a single audience in mind. While I’m sure those types of movies are well-intentioned, all they really do is segregate the Gospel’s open message of hope, grace and redemption from the rest of society. It’s just a die-hard truth that your next door neighbor who doesn't give much thought to religion isn’t going to plop down ten bucks to go see some faith-based flick like The Last Sin Eater--which was an excellent novel from Francine Rivers, but I didn't quite buy it as a movie (maybe it was the incredibly cheesy special effects). But chances are that non-believing neighbor sees a lot of mainstream films on a regular basis. If we want to have intelligent, comfortable, yet relevant conversations with others about what we hold most important, we've got to be on level ground with them, and movies create that shared medium.

So in that vain, I’m establishing a virtual film festival (cue the orchestra...) celebrating the faith-based messaging we see in movies more often than we probably realize. While there is a niche in which a studio or two caters to the Jesus crowd with offshoots like Fox Searchlight after The Passion box-office phenomenon, overall, including biblical themes is not an agenda most Hollywood producers carry. Yet, it’s impossible for them to avoid, because these elements are deeply woven within the very fabric of human life. Some of the greatest films ever made, and many of my favorites that are not quite as critically acclaimed (The Three Amigos anybody?), are anchored by aspects of faith: redemption, sacrifice, unconditional love, grace, truth, purpose, hope, the sanctity of life and more.

So that’s what will be recognized here: movies that either blatantly or unintentionally present these elements in varying degrees. OK, it's not really a film festival--it's just me sitting in the recliner tapping away on my laptop in between glances at the TV screen. So it won’t ever be Sundance, Tribeca or Cannes, and you’ll have to get the popcorn, Twizzlers and coke on your own. But check these movies out if you get the chance, look for the aspects of faith on film, and use them as a springboard for conversation.

We'll kick things off with one of my favorites, a movie that was brilliantly adapted from the pages of a well known novelist. Tune back soon.