There aren’t many things of which I’m afraid—I mean really afraid, aside from spiders, Pet Cemetery, Linda Blair as a child (or any ghoulish-looking little girl for that matter), that freaky one-eyed witch from the Kevin Costner Robin Hood flick, Kimbo Slice, and waking up in the middle of the night to see someone standing over me next to my bed, regardless of whether it’s my wife, kids, a ghost girl, Kimbo Slice, Kevin Costner or anybody else. But one thing that really freaks me out are those crazy, deadly viruses, such as Avian Influenza, also known as Bird Flu.
Because of this, living in a potential Bird Flu hotspot—thanks to all the chicken-producing farms that dot our area’s landscape—has never sat well with me. Especially when all you heard on the news every single day was that the next big plague was on its way. Sure, it’s all well beyond my control, and I wouldn’t say I had poultry pandemic panic or anything, and it's not what'll happen to me after I die, because I know that's all good and taken care of. But the thought of bleeding profusely from my eyes, ears and nose while convulsing with a 107-degree fever just isn’t my preferred way of leaving this world for the next one.
Anyway, remember about a year-and-a-half ago when it happened first in some Far Eastern country (not far from the SARS breakout), killing several people who had fowl as part of their families, then spread to some Indian town, found its way to Albania, crept into Western Europe, flew into Africa, and then next thing you know, took wings to the U.K? At this point all you heard was one media outlet after another proclaiming like some “The End is Near” sandwich-sign wearing naysayer, “It’s coming, it’s coming, it’s coming!!! And we’re ALL GONNA DIE!!!” Books were written on how to survive it, bad TV movies were made, Vitamin C and Purel flew off the shelves, pigeons suffered hate crimes.
And then…
Nothing happened. You never heard a word about it. After all the panic, just like that, the mass hysteria was gone. Was it a global conspiracy involving governments and drug companies? Was it ever a truly legit threat?
I don’t know… that’s why I’m asking. Not that I miss it, but I’m just wondering what the heck ever happened to bird flu???
Until I get answers, I’m not about to give up Chick-Fil-A anytime soon, but you won’t see us adopting any birds for pets—the only way fowl enters our home is by way of the grill. And then cooked very well done, just to be safe.
Because of this, living in a potential Bird Flu hotspot—thanks to all the chicken-producing farms that dot our area’s landscape—has never sat well with me. Especially when all you heard on the news every single day was that the next big plague was on its way. Sure, it’s all well beyond my control, and I wouldn’t say I had poultry pandemic panic or anything, and it's not what'll happen to me after I die, because I know that's all good and taken care of. But the thought of bleeding profusely from my eyes, ears and nose while convulsing with a 107-degree fever just isn’t my preferred way of leaving this world for the next one.
Anyway, remember about a year-and-a-half ago when it happened first in some Far Eastern country (not far from the SARS breakout), killing several people who had fowl as part of their families, then spread to some Indian town, found its way to Albania, crept into Western Europe, flew into Africa, and then next thing you know, took wings to the U.K? At this point all you heard was one media outlet after another proclaiming like some “The End is Near” sandwich-sign wearing naysayer, “It’s coming, it’s coming, it’s coming!!! And we’re ALL GONNA DIE!!!” Books were written on how to survive it, bad TV movies were made, Vitamin C and Purel flew off the shelves, pigeons suffered hate crimes.
And then…
Nothing happened. You never heard a word about it. After all the panic, just like that, the mass hysteria was gone. Was it a global conspiracy involving governments and drug companies? Was it ever a truly legit threat?
I don’t know… that’s why I’m asking. Not that I miss it, but I’m just wondering what the heck ever happened to bird flu???
Until I get answers, I’m not about to give up Chick-Fil-A anytime soon, but you won’t see us adopting any birds for pets—the only way fowl enters our home is by way of the grill. And then cooked very well done, just to be safe.
No comments:
Post a Comment